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Tag: satire

Five good reasons not to nuke Washington, DC

Kevin Barrett

Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Kim Jong-un’s Nuclear Threats By Kevin Barrett, TruthJihad.com When I heard that North Korean Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un was threatening to nuke Washington, DC, and “engulf the nation’s capital in a sea of flames,” my first thought was: “At last, a politician with a plan that could actually solve our nation’s most pressing problems.” The thought of Inside-the-Beltway Washington going up in flames brought joy to my heart. The politicians – incinerated! The lobbyists – carbonized! The Supreme Court – cremated! The Pentagon – a five-sided crème brûlée! AIPAC – reduced…

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I LOVE Big Brother – so don’t bother torturing me!

Kevin Barrett

  “The concept of the ‘living will’ could also be applied to the issue of torture. Just as you might wake up some day as a human vegetable – who knows, bad things do happen to good people – you might likewise wake up some day strapped to a gurney in a cage in Guantanamo with spark plug wires hooked to your testicles. If that happened, wouldn’t it be great if you could say: ‘Don’t bother torturing me, I’ve already signed a document giving you everything you could possibly need!’” Full story: http://truthjihad.com/news/?p=363

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It’s hard to write satire these days

Kevin Barrett

How can you write satire, when “mainstream consensus reality” is already a dark parody of itself? Marx’s remark that history repeats itself, first as tragedy, then as farce, applies in spades to the Project for a New American Century (PNAC).  PNAC’s “new Pearl Harbor” on 9/11 was tragic. Today, its “more wars for Israel” cheerleading is farcical.  For details, see my new article: 9/11 PNAC perps still whining for US to fight Israel’s wars So there’s just no way that a satirist can keep up with the absurdity of reality. But somebody’s got to try:President Morsi should apologize – to…

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Conspiracy Theories: A Modest Proposal

Kevin Barrett

by Sass Cuntstein, Information Czar and Cuntstitutional Scholar Extraordinaire In my previous article “Conspiracy Theories: Causes and Cures,” I argued that conspiracy theories – especially the ones that are true – pose a growing threat to Western civilization in general, and to people like me in particular. I pointed out that since 9/11, a veritable tsunami of conspiracy theories has been racing toward the American shore, threatening to wash away everything we have accomplished. Clearly, something must be done… (READ THE FULL ARTICLE)

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Just what the world needs – another social network!

Kevin Barrett

  Have you heard about the new social network – like Facebook, only with very short messages (for the people with REALLY short attention spans)? It’s called Farter. People send out very brief messages called “farts.” The recipients “sniff” the “farts.” So each message racks up a certain number of “sniffs.” Instead of just “liking” or ignoring a “fart,” the “sniffer” rates it as “sweet,” “odorless,” “”mild,”  “pungent,” “stinky,”  “grab a gas mask,” or “run for your lives.” Adjustable fart-filters allow users to filter out farts that exceed a designated level of odoriferousness. Farter users pride themselves on the gaseous,…

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Who’s Afraid of Gordon Duff; Bibi angling for fallback career on Broadway

Kevin Barrett

Here are links to my latest two articles. If you like this stuff, please become a member at TruthJihad.com! Gordon Duff flays Bibi “Wile E. Coyote” Netanyahu on Press TV Who’s afraid of Gordon Duff?   Who’s afraid of Gordon Duff? Not me. But maybe I should be. Like Otto, Kevin Cline’s G. Gordon Liddy-based character in A Fish Called Wanda, Gordon has a high opinion of his own fighting skills, an even higher opinion of his own intelligence, and is the kind of guy you’d suspect of having killed people for the CIA. full story: http://truthjihad.com/news/?p=154 Bibi angling for…

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Top Ten Reasons Obama Will Appear on Letterman instead of Meeting Netanyahu

Kevin Barrett

“So David, are you ready for the top ten reasons I snubbed Netanyahu?”  Obama to Appear at Comedy Show Instead of Meeting Netanyahu: Reports US President Barack Obama will appear on a late night comedy show during a September 18 visit to New York at the same time he could have met Israeli premier, reports say. Reports by Israeli media outlets of Obama’s presence in David Letterman’s comedy show, instead of meeting Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, come amid mounting tensions between the two allies over setting “red lines” by Washington on Iran’s nuclear energy program, a request the US…

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Exclusive interview! Donald Rumsfeld defends predator drones

Kevin Barrett

I was lucky enough to catch up with Donald Rumsfeld, former Secretary of Defense, at the Edward Teach Memorial Golf Course and Scuba Diving Facility outside of Kingston, Jamaica. Rummy had hit two horrible shots in a row, badly slicing both of his balls, and was in a foul mood. InterviewerHey Rummy, you aim golf balls even worse than predator drones! RumsfeldWatch out, asshole, or I’ll aim one at you. InterviewerIf you did, I’d be the safest guy on the fairway. RumsfeldThere are known knowns, known unknowns, unknown knowns, and unknown unknowns. You’re an unknown unknown. Bug off. InterviewerActually, I…

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