Back when I was young and weird — before I became a nice, normal radical Muslim conspiracy theorist — I wrote Dr. Weirde’s Weirde Tour Guide to San Francisco, the book that paid for the first couple of years of my Ph.D. program. (You can tell it’s a cult classic because “like new” copies are selling for a lot of money.)
My tour of Belgium, the Netherlands and Germany started off like something out of my own weirde tour guidebook. The first place my hosts took me to see was Brussels’ biggest tourist attraction, the mannekin pis — a statue of a child urinating. For some reason the tourists really love this, and the locals have obliged by making it the unofficial mascot of Brussels. To my Muslim hosts, of course, the cult of the mannekin-pis is classic illustration of Western decadence. I can’t say I disagree. Worshiping statues is bad enough — that was precisely the sin of the pre-Islamic idolators — but flocking to pay obeisance to a stone child squirting water from his male organ is WEIRDE with an e.
The next stop on our weirde tour was the atomium, a gigantic sculpture representing the unit cell of an iron crystal magnified 165 billion times. Kind of cool, but utterly pointless. A much better idea would be to build a gigantic sculpture of a nanothermite molecule multiplied 165 million times…right on Ground Zero. That’s almost as good an idea as my “build the world’s biggest mosque on Ground Zero, complete with two 110-story minarets, as an apology to Muslims for falsely blaming them for 9/11” proposal that Obama rejected and Mike Pintek and Matt Taibbi really hated.
After spending the day in Brussels and the night in Ghent, we passed through Rotterdam en route to the Hague, and passed a very weirde bus on the freeway. It looked like this:
I assumed that Interpol had finally captured George W. Bush and was transporting him, on this aptly-named bus, to the International Criminal Court. My hosts informed me that, unfortunately, this was just the odd appellation of a German bus line that is apparently named after its oddly-appellated owner.
Okay, enough weirdness! Tomorrow I promise to get serious and tell you about the 9/11-truth-related stuff I’ve been doing, including today’s talk to roughly 1000 very receptive people at the Yeni Asya convention in Cologne.