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Was that Bush’s bus heading for the Hague? My European tour turns weirde from the outset

Back when I was young and weird — before I became a nice, normal radical Muslim conspiracy theorist — I wrote Dr. Weirde’s Weirde Tour Guide to San Francisco, the book that paid for the first couple of years of my Ph.D. program. (You can tell it’s a cult classic because “like new” copies are selling for a lot of money.)

My tour of Belgium, the Netherlands and Germany started off like something out of my own weirde tour guidebook. The first place my hosts took me to see was Brussels’ biggest tourist attraction, the mannekin pis — a statue of a child urinating. For some reason the tourists really love this, and the locals have obliged by making it the unofficial mascot of Brussels. To my Muslim hosts, of course, the cult of the mannekin-pis is classic illustration of Western decadence. I can’t say I disagree. Worshiping statues is bad enough — that was precisely the sin of the pre-Islamic idolators — but flocking to pay obeisance to a stone child squirting water from his male organ is WEIRDE with an e.

The next stop on our weirde tour was the atomium, a gigantic sculpture representing the unit cell of an iron crystal magnified 165 billion times. Kind of cool, but utterly pointless. A much better idea would be to build a gigantic sculpture of a nanothermite molecule multiplied 165 million times…right on Ground Zero. That’s almost as good an idea as my “build the world’s biggest mosque on Ground Zero, complete with two 110-story minarets, as an apology to Muslims for falsely blaming them for 9/11” proposal that Obama rejected and Mike Pintek and Matt Taibbi  really hated.

What if this were a gigantic sculpture of a nanothermite molecule on Ground Zero?

After spending the day in Brussels and the night in Ghent, we passed through Rotterdam en route to the Hague, and passed a very weirde bus on the freeway. It looked like this:

I assumed that Interpol had finally captured George W. Bush and was transporting him, on this aptly-named bus, to the International Criminal Court. My hosts informed me that, unfortunately, this was just the odd appellation of a German bus line that is apparently named after its oddly-appellated owner.

Okay, enough weirdness! Tomorrow I promise to get serious and tell you about the 9/11-truth-related stuff I’ve been doing, including today’s talk to roughly 1000 very receptive people at the Yeni Asya convention in Cologne.

7 Thoughts to “Was that Bush’s bus heading for the Hague? My European tour turns weirde from the outset”

  1. Got a kick out of Bush's bus…let's ask the German owner to hold it in reserve…may come in handy soon, Inshallah.

  2. Anonymous

    A man of many talents, and Weirde guide author to boot!

    Kevin, we hardly knew ye!

    Have a great trip.

    -Chris

  3. Anonymous

    Lovely bus and all…..

    I was weirde right along with you i guess,
    back there.

    In my Restaurant in BurlingtonVT [everybody has to eat!] that I built post my first failed 23 runs at Congress, I installed my own white-painted concrete copy of "mannekin pis" — and we piped our house white wine through it…literally held your glass right up there and filled it from his you know in public at the bar in our place. Leunig's Old World Cafe…..named after the most famous cartoonist in Australia: Michael leunig. –and for YEARS I waited for some newpaper reporter to make something out of our bad taste, so i could joke on their pages
    that our house white was a LOT better than piss. But they never fell for it! They don't like to give "free advertising" to radicals. Enjoy enjoy the Old World!
    –Dennis Morrisseau dmorso1@netzero.net.
    W. Pawlet, VT 802 645 9727
    The bus describes Bush and Obama perfectly,
    "N'est-ce pas?"

  4. sometimes i wish i could begin my letters to the editors with:

    Dear Fucker… and then give them all a piece of my mind…

  5. Nanothermite is a molecule? Rock on, Kevin, make fools of your supporters by feeding them with crap.

  6. HA HA HA! Brian "SnugBug" Good finally falls into the trap.

    Before posting this I said "I'll bet sex-stalker Brian Good will post a comment whining about how nanothermite technically isn't a molecule."

    Well, the Atomium technically isn't a direct blowup of an atom (or molecule) either.

    A "nanothermite molecule" for the purposes of the kind of sculpture I am proposing here would, of course, technically consist of two molecules — one of iron and one of aluminum, the components of thermite. But spelling that out in a brief satirical post would be pointlessly pedantic. Much more amusing to set a trap for the SnugBugger!

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