Dear Newt Gingrich, I am writing to volunteer to step in as your new chief campaign adviser, now that your former staff, followers, and prospective voters have deserted you in disgust. I believe I can devise a strategy that will not only get you elected President, despite your recently-revealed foibles, but perhaps even lead to a far more powerful position. As a Muslim free-speech fanatic, I may seem an unlikely candidate for chief Gingrich advisor. After all, you are on record calling for a “long war” against Islam that will require the US to abrogate its freedom of speech and…
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